Wow! You actually came to this page. Our lawyers made us include it because it's really important stuff. We took the legalese the lawyers wrote and translated it into readable English. So be a smart net-head and read the stuff on this page. It could prevent you from having problems.

If you visit our Website, you're also legally obligated to the terms and conditions listed below and any other law or regulation that applies to the Website, the Internet, the World Wide Web, or Los Angeles, California. You shouldn't access or browse the Website if you have any problem with that, because once you start, there's no turning back -- you are bound by the terms and conditions.

We run this Website so that people like you can use it for personal entertainment, information, education, and cyber-gratification. So go ahead and browse around all you like. We may even give you stuff to download from the Website but it is only for non-commercial, personal use. And don't fool around with the copyright and other notices all over the stuff. They're there for a really good reason. And don't even think about distributing, modifying, transmitting, reusing, re-posting, or anything else uncool with any of the stuff, including the text, images, audio, and video, for public or commercial purposes unless we give you written permission. And it's not likely we will.

So here's the Top Ten Rules for Cyber-surfers on our Website:

1. For everyone's sake, just assume that everything on the Website is copyrighted unless we say it's not. So you can't use the stuff except how we say you can on this page or anywhere else on the Website without our written permission. And like we said before, it's not likely we'll give you permission anyway.

2. While we try to include accurate stuff on the Website, we're not promising you it's accurate. In fact, we're not promising you anything except fun and entertainment. So if you use stuff on the Website, you're using it at your own risk. Don't call us if there's a problem because we assume no liability or responsibility for errors or omissions on the Website.

3. We and anybody else who helped us create, produce, or deliver the Website are not liable for any damages you suffer when you use it. In particular, the lawyers want you to know that our disclaimer includes, "direct, incidental, consequential, indirect, or punitive damages arising out of your access to, or use of, the Website. Without limiting the foregoing, everything on the Website is provided to you 'AS IS' WITHOUT WARRANTY OF ANY KIND, EITHER EXPRESSED OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING, BUT NOT LIMITED TO, THE IMPLIED WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY, FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE, OR NON INFRINGEMENT. Please note that some jurisdictions may not allow the exclusion of implied warranties, so some of the above exclusions may not apply to you. Check your local laws for any restrictions or limitations regarding the exclusion of implied warranties." What a mouthful from the mouthpieces. We put all of that in quotes because we couldn't figure out any other way to say it that the lawyers would accept. But here's the bottom line -- we're not responsible if you're browsing around and the Website damages you or your computer or infects it with any nasty viruses. We sure hope that doesn't happen, but if it does, don't call us.

4. If you don't want the world to know something, don't post it on the Website in any bulletin board or anyplace else. That's because anything you disclose to us is ours. That's right -- ours. So we can do anything we want with the stuff you post. We can reproduce it, disclose it, transmit it, publish it, broadcast it, and post it someplace else. Not only that, we can even use any ideas, concepts, know-how, or techniques you post any way we want to, including, developing, manufacturing and marketing products or other stuff using the information you post.

5. Pictures of people or places shown on the Website are either our property or someone else's property we're using with their permission. No matter what, it's definitely not your property. You can't use it unless we said you can on this page or somewhere else on the Website. So be careful because unauthorized use may violate all sorts of nasty laws. Be smart, keep the stuff you download to yourself.

6. There's also a lot of trademarks, logos, and service marks on the Website, including, but not limited to, Pee-wee's Playhouse, Pee-wee Herman, Herman World, Image Entertainment, IImagine Studios, etc. that either we own or we're using with someone else's permission. So don't think you have any kind of license or right to use them, because you don't and please don't mess with the trademarks, logos and service marks on our Website or you are likely to be sued or have a prosecutor come after you for messing around with the property of others.

7. You may notice we've linked our Website to others. While that's cool, it doesn't mean we've looked at all those Websites, much less checked them out periodically to see what's going on. So don't blame us if some Website you link to is bad or has stuff on it that offends you or your pets. Go ahead and link, but remember, you're doing it at your risk.

8. That brings us to what you do on our own site. While we have no present plans for chat groups, discussion groups or bulletin boards however, should we decide to include them at a later date, we take no responsibility and assume no liability for the content of those locations or for any mistakes, defamation, libel, slander, omissions, falsehoods, obscenity, or profanity you might encounter when you visit such places on our site. And don't be stupid by posting or transmitting any unlawful, threatening, libelous, defamatory, obscene, scandalous, inflammatory, nasty, mean, or profane material or any material that violates any law -- anywhere, anytime. While we certainly respect your privacy, we have no choice but to fully cooperate with any law enforcement authorities or court which might ask us who might have posted such material on our site.

9. Software that we use on this Website is protected by all sorts of patriotic U.S. laws. Because of that, you can't download or send the software to anyone in the vacation travel spots of Cuba, Iraq, Libya, North Korea, Iran, Syria, or any other country where United States has embargoed goods; or (get this) to anyone on the United States Treasury Department's list of Specially Designated Nationals, the U.S. Commerce Department's Table of Deny Orders, or the FBI's Most Wanted Internet Creeps List (just kidding on the last one). As if that were not tough enough, if you live in or are a national of any of those lovely places, you're not even supposed to be reading this page.

10. We're also allowed to change this page and anything else on the Website any time we want to. That's because it's ours and we have the programmers who can do it. If we do change the page, then you're bound by those changes, too, whenever you visit our Website.

Copyright © 2004 Herman World, Inc. All rights reserved.